I have a great friend who, every time we would go to a Chinese restaurant he would eagerly rush to open up his fortune cookie, only to get a crestfallen look on his face (for the benefit of those around who had never seen him pull off this stunt) as he read out the supposed message inside, "You will meet a tall dark stranger."?...I suspect this is from a movie...Does anyone know?  In any case, here's a lame first attempt for a physics fortune cookie:

You will meet a tall dark stranger...very tall, in fact, representing 72% of the known universe, her name will be 'energy'.

NSF Program Director (on assignment from the AIP and the Society of Physics Students to serve as the Robert Noyce Scholarship Program Director at the National Science Foundation)

"You have a magnetic personality.  People are drawn to you"

I always get crappy ones like this that don't tell you your future, but some stupid thing about myself.

-al

You will find yourself in a highly charged situation.

Heh.

Dodge this.

Here is mine

"Give a kiss to the person next to you."

I kept it for future uses.

Yu

Life is governed by principles, no matter how uncertain they may be.

God made the world in seven days. You will spend of your life figuring out why.