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Heisenberg uncertainty - Sep 29, 2005 at 12:10AM
yhou
9 Posts

Mr. Heisenberg is driving on the free way and a police officer stopped him for speeding. Officer walks up to Heisenberg's car and asks him, "Sir, do you know how fast you are going?" Mr. Heisenberg said "Officer, I have no idea how fast I am going, but I know exactly where I am."


Replies to Heisenberg uncertainty

Another one - Oct 04 2005 3:26AM
yhou
9 Posts

"Theory is when you know how it works but it still doesn't. Practice is when it works but you don't know why. In this Department [Physics], theory and practice are joined together: nothing works and no one knows why!"



more - Oct 04 2005 3:28AM
yhou
9 Posts

Matter is fundamentally lazy:- It always takes the path of least effort
Matter is fundamentally stupid:- It tries every other path first.
That is the heart of physics - The rest is details.



Re: Heisenberg uncertainty - Oct 06 2005 12:44AM
Jackie
3 Posts

That is my all time favorite physics joke :).



One more - Oct 20 2005 10:31PM
yhou
9 Posts

Q: Why won't Heisenbergs' operators live in the suburbs
A: They don't commute



new joke - Nov 29 2005 3:35AM
yhou
9 Posts

Once all the scientists die and go to heaven. They decide to play hide-n-seek.
Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has the den. He is supposed to count
upto 100 and then start searching. Everyone starts hiding except Newton.
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in it, right in front of
Einstein.
Einsteins counting ....97,98,99,100, opens his eyes and finds Newton
standing in front. Einstein says "Newtons out, Newton's out."

Newton denies and says I am not out. He claims that he is not Newton. All
the scientists come out and he proves that he is not Newton.  how?

Newton says:
I am standing in a square of area 1m square..
That means I am Newton per meter square..
Hence I am Pascal.
Since newton per meter square = Pascal



Re: new joke - Dec 03 2005 1:56PM
Deuce Avatar
Deuce
VA
14 Posts

I used this one last night!! It was a riot!!

"And I was like... I'm a riot... you're a freakin' riot!!!"
<>


-Deuce



Re: Re: new joke - Sep 27 2006 1:51AM
aino akinome
1 Posts

> Re: Re: new joke
>
> I used this one last night!! It was a riot!!
>
> "And
> I was like... I'm a riot... you're a freakin' riot!!!
>
> <>
>
>
> -Deuce



That sucks men!

This is a joke from a certain site about (So you think Physics is funny?)

Q: Why won't Heisenberg's operators live in the suburbs?
A: They don't commute.
Q: What do you get if you cross a pig with a rat?
A: Pig rat sine theta.
So this neutron walks into a bar, orders a pint of lager and begins to open his wallet when the barman says, "For you, no charge!".
Just for a laugh
Just for a laugh

These jokes make you laugh or grimace in a certain extent... But take note, it never made me laugh. Why? I don't feel like laughing into it... That's all...


------------------------------------------

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Re: Heisenberg uncertainty - Feb 01 2006 10:34PM
Alysson Avatar
Alysson
My chair
196 Posts

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Scroll down and you'll find:

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.


-al


Re: Re: Heisenberg uncertainty - Feb 01 2006 10:38PM
Alysson Avatar
Alysson
My chair
196 Posts

And there's also the un-PC:

Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.


-al


Re: Re: Re: Heisenberg uncertainty - Sep 08 2011 6:11AM
saroy 123
2 Posts

Q: Why won't Heisenbergs' operators live in the suburbs
A: They don't commute


Knob Stainless Steel